Confessions of a (Young) Project-Based Member

Knowing people for the first time and being certain that they'll eventually leave.
Since from the start, I've been dealing with fear.

Being left alone. Feeling all the pressure. Carrying all the burdens.
Innocence equates to lack of experience.

This ain't an excuse. I am willing to learn, I am ready to accept the responsibilities.
But please remember that I am still in progress.

I know, I don't have full control... and that's what makes me more fearful.

Let me know what's happening.
With that, I can make myself ready for change - which I expect but hate.

In addition, I value people. But change is inevitable. That's why, I suffer even more.

"This is just business. Don't take it personally."
Just like what I said from the start, I work with passion.
I invest on something wholeheartedly. Telling me all that will never be valid.

On a lighter note, I am enjoying the ride. I've got nothing to lose. I am learning a lot.

Dear Abbie, Mama knows best :))

Mama's out. Papa's sleeping.
She has no other choice...

Abbie: Ate Mae, malibang ko.
Ako: *taranta* Ha? Paghubo dayun ug panty! Pagdali! Nah, maka-igit napud gani ka ah!
Abbie: *nag-dali2x*

Gi-open ang CR, balik dayon sa computer... Abbie, nalibang.

Minutes later...

Abbie: Ate Mae!
Ako: *computer*
Abbie: Ate Mae! Humana ko!
Ako: *computer*
Abbie: Ate Mae! Ate Mae!
Ako: *nakadungog pero computer japun*
Abbie: Ateeeeeeeeeeee!!

Mama's home.

Ako: *overjoyed* Bi, naa na si Mama~~!
Mama: Kabalo ko, kabalo ko~~ *with a smile*
Ako: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

She knows I didn't want to clean Abbie's butt. HAHAHA!

Sorry Bi, I love you but not your butt... Your butt with your stinky shit. HAHAHAHA And besides, I hate cleaning your butt with my foot because I can't do it with my own hands. My hands belong to my own shit alone. And even if you don't mind me using my foot to clean your butt, my conscience tells me that it's not good and it's rude. But that's how I do it. That's the only way I could do it. That's why, I hate doing it. I opt to not do it. Makes sense?

HAHAHA Sorry Abbie.. Aryat kaayo imung Ate XD

I LOVE YOU~~ ^^♥

Officemate thought I am an only child...

Because Papa brought me snacks on my first day of work.

"Pinalangga siguro kay ka."

"Palangga jud kaayo Ma'am."

I don't like being praised but when people compliment my parents, it just feels different.
Proud and grateful. AHHHHH~~ ♥

:')

I AM OKAY

Exactly one month ago, I was hesitant. Scared. Uncertain.

I took the risk because I have to. Even if I knew from the very start that going through that door would lead me to a world that I never hoped for.

Independence Day 2013. I was defeated by my hollow form.

I shut down my social networking accounts and hid myself from everyone. When I have a personal problem, I usually don't like telling anyone (even my closest friends or my mom). I am not used to sharing my inner struggles because I always have the urge to protect those who are involved. But that was just a different story.

I was too hurt and suppressing the pain hurt me even more. Until this idiot came.

Kathreen Poculan. The baddest female alive. HAHAHA

She's that person who carries a lot of burden on her shoulders but can still make you feel happy despite all that. Yes, she has BIG problems. Be ashamed if you don't realize that after she makes you laugh. But what the heck! That girl is an idiot. She can make everyone happy even if she's bleeding inside. She's a strong woman.

It's been a month. And this time, I can finally say, I AM OKAY.

I believe God comforts you in times of trouble by sending His angels. I never asked her help (even if I badly needed it) but she came. Thanks Kat! I truly believe He created that day when we first knew each other for a greater purpose.

Remember that it's okay for us to be happy. It's okay for us to be sad. At the end of the day, we can always look forward to the sunrise. Just like what you said, "we're not lost". Let's be happy together. Let's be sad together.

Let's continue to sail together until we could get there.