05.17.13

Apparently, they reminded me that today is my birthday.

(c) Gisela

I love surprises. 

I love participating on birthday surprises. 

But I don't like receiving birthday surprises.

My birthday falls on summer. No classes.. Which means, friends are on vacation. And I like it. I am used to it. My birthday, for me, actually means celebrating it with my whole family (includes my Tito, Tita, Lolo, Lola, cousins). It's been a tradition. We go to Timoga, enjoy the pool together.. Or stay at home, eat dinner together. It's as if, my birthday is a family outing/gathering. And, it doesn't usually fall on the 17th of May. We move it on a weekend, no work, so everyone could go. Which would make me think that my birthday is not actually on a specific day. My birthday is NOT my birthday, it's a family day - and I like it more that way.

Which is why, I am not used to the spotlight. I don't like it. 

I am not comfortable with the attention from others. I like being alone. 

Yes! At times, I am introvert.

Usually, when my birthday celebration is moved, what I do during the 17th is to be with myself. Take a step back and seclude myself from everyone. That even includes my family. And yes, that includes my friends. 

Sorry Ina, Sharmagne, and Kathy (and ZUMATZ from the previous years). Again, 'long story'. 

And yeah, congrats thank you Gisela and Jomai!

* * * * *

22 years.. and I realized, I am misunderstood. 

Thus, the post. Have to explain myself so people would get it.

Sorry. I am just terrible at explaining. But please remember that 'long story' means there's something wrong. I don't like sharing the story because it's too personal, sad, and pathetic. I don't mean to hurt anyone. By not asking what's wrong, you're letting me know that it's okay to protect myself. It's okay to be selfish sometimes. It's okay to be alone.

* * * * *

Off to Timoga with the whole family tomorrow. I don't usually invite friends because I know you won't be comfortable with it. Sorry. I can be this awkward.

* * * * *

But then, life is not about all these worldly stuff. We all know that. 

Thanks to everyone who wished me a 'happy birthday' though. But THANK YOU so much more to every single person who became a part of my 22 years. I know, it's not easy. Thank you for bearing with my weirdness. Thank you for making me appreciate (my) life more because you're part of it. Until tomorrow, the next day, or the moment that you'll get tired of me. HAH!

Naweng. BOW.

NOTE: This blog is my virtual outlet. Where things get real. Won't talk about anything here in person.